It was 2008.

I first got introduced to Placebo by someone who only into music but not the classes. He showed me a video on YouTube, a live concert in Amsterdam or something. Then I was listening to Placebo all days in my 10m2 room after school on my lenovo laptop 14" that has a CD-ROM can read CD!

The song I particularly liked were "Twenty Years" and "Song to say goodbye". Twent years was great because I was 20 years old. Song to say goodbye was also perfect because I thought I was god’s mistake and want to say goodbye to my previous life. Interesting how lyrics could reasonate with people in certain period of life.

One day I finished school. I walked into a CD shop around the old library. I bought the Battle for the sun album. Then I listened to that album all nights after school. One day somehow I saw a poster in the cafeterial at university says Placebo has a concert in Antwerp.

I never been to event like that. I want to go! No other Asian people would spend 80 euros or so to go to an concert with me. I have no courage to ask anyone else. I went alone. I think it was 15000 people at Sportpaleis. These dutch words are so hard to spell but somehow I remember them..

That concert was phenomenal. Live concert v.s. lousy music on my lenovo laptop. The difference sky rocketed. So loud. Beats pumped to my heart. Felt alive. I was pretty scared when I went to toilet. I had discrimination experiences. When I went night club, people would take my hat and would not give me back.

I am very sure I did not see any other Asian in that concert. That many people and just me. I felt I had stepped into a new world. A world I never see before. That bathroom trip went ok.

The concert ended not that late. But there was no train going back from Antwerp to Leuven. Every group of people came by car. I was wearing a colorful jacket and blue jeans. Checking my Nokia pretend I got something. But nah, I got nothing.

I wander around in the city. Good thing is Nokia’s battery life is pretty long. I remember few snake games when I was sitting in weird places. That group of people speaking in Dutch I dont understand. That couple kissing. That night place selling late night snack. The guy slept on the floor. I was scared, but I got to hold til the morning.

I don’t exactly remember how I got home. But the next day I went to school in the afternoon. I never tell anyone I went to that concert. Professor was giving lectures. But my mind was all musics.